Sunday, March 4, 2012

Assumptions and Awesomeness, or, It’s Not You, it’s Me….ALLLLLLLL ME!

WARNING: Late night rant. Proceed at your own risk.
What is up with people feeling the need to volunteer why they could NEVER homeschool their children when they learn that I homeschool mine? Almost without fail, upon learning I’m a homeschooler, people IMMEDIATELY launch into all the reasons why they CAN’T or WON’T homeschool. Rarely am I ever asked why I chose to homeschool or what prompted me to make the decision to teach my tribe at home.  A typical introductory conversation goes like this:
Person: So, where do your kids go to school?
Me: We homeschool.
Person: Oh, Lord. I could NEVER homeschool. Ijustdon’thavethepatienceIneedneedabreakfrommykidsI’mnothatorganizedIcouldn’tstandthemessIcan’tdealwithmykidsoverjustthesummermuchlesslongerthanthatWebuttheadsoverhomeworkwhywouldIwantodothat24/7I’mnotthatselfdisciplineddidImentionIdon’thavethepatienceforsomethinglikethat?
Me, mentally: Holy crap, you didn’t even take a breath!

Then, after being assaulted by this litany, I’m always left feeling I have to say something to reassure the person that they are perfectly normal and I’m a nut job or to try to convince them that:
I very often want to scream
I want to flee to Vegas
I desperately crave some alone time
I made the kids use the neighbor’s toilet because someone clogged ours with a stuffed animal and a plastic bag
I’m not a disciple of Martha Stewart
I’d much rather sleep or read a good book than make sure the kids are practicing their times tables. 
But what I want to do is ask:
Why do you feel the need to hurry and tell me why you’re incapable of homeschooling?
Do you think I’m judging you?
Do you think I’m going to try to convert you?
What exactly do you think homeschooling involves?
When people launch unasked or unprovoked into their reasons for why they won’t/can’t homeschool, they are being defensive—which means they feel threatened…but why do they feel threatened?  I’m actually a fervent supporter of good public schools and of making good education available free of charge to the masses.  I don’t think homeschooling and public schooling should be an either/or issue.  I think homeschooling should just be one of the many viable educational options.  But no one really knows that because I can’t get a word in edgewise to even reassure them that IT’S OKAY NOT TO HOMESCHOOL!
So ease up, folks.  You don’t have to defend yourself to me. Live and let live. And BREATHE.  Please BREATHE. 
But, just soze ya know, I’m tired of trying to be relatable and convince you that I’m just like you. If you’re determined to believe that I am such a saint, so be it. Put me on that pedestal.  I’ve decided I’m pretty damn awesome after all.


  1. I always knew you were pretty damn awesome. (And you know what that means coming from me.)

    Love seeing these posts.

  2. WOW! Im actually glad you said this because I get the SAME EXACT thing about when I mention Collin is in the national guard/military. So annoying...."I could NEVER be an army wife, Im too selfish, I need my husband here with me and the children, Im not as strong as you, blah blah blah" or on the other end... "I would never ever EVER let my husband do the military" They automatically put up these defenses when all I did was answer their question about what my husband does. Seriously, people act like your judging them or that Im trying to convert them as well and then I have people who make me sound like an awful wife because I let my husband join? makes no sense. Whew ok, I think I needed to vent too!